THE BORDER REPORT

I expect the Homeland Security Department to engage in paranoid fantasies; it's good for budgets, great for morale, and delineates a nice, clear boundary between friend and foe. That's the game.

The latest fantasy is somewhat astounding in that the Feds attribute the new threat to their successes on the border. I guess I expect that, too. What I don't expect is a newspaper the stature of the Los Angeles Times to allow itself to be used as a tool for those fantastic delusions. But that's exactly what the paper did yesterday when it published a story about an internal law enforcement report that Joaquín Shorty Guzmán had lain down the order to kill any Fed that gets in the way.

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THE BORDER REPORT

Ay Mexico, pobre Mexico. Con la cruz en el pecho y el diablo en los hechos. Far be it for me to pass judgement on an entire country, but its government? The only players squirming worse than the Mexicans is Smithfields Foods, Inc., which co-owns the pig farm where the desmadre began.

I've been watching their p.r. page over the past couple days, it's amusing, and enlightening. On April 26, Smithfield Foods issued a press release to investors saying there was no evidence that Carroll Farms had anything to do with the swine flu. A day later, that was hedged:

 

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THE BORDER REPORT

Well, this is shaping up to be a fairly demonic Wednesday. The bodies of two military intel officers from the Mexican Army were found yesterday in the hills of Durango. Both had been shot several times, a note left with the bodies: "No government, no priest can stand against El Chapo." The bodies were found just outside Guanacevi, the small town where Archbishop Hector González told reporters that Joaquín Shorty Guzmán lives. Hm. Bad business that, turning priests against you. Assuming this wasn't a decoy job by the Beltrán Leyvas, of course. Which could be very possible. Because if Chapo ordered the hit, then he just put the Calderón Administration on notice, mocking the president and the Catholic Church. It's a bit interesting because that doesn't seem to be Chapo's style. He's not necessarily low key, but neither does he clamor for the federal government's attentions. These two murders have all the markings of a challenge and it's going to be one that Mexico City cannot ignore. Couple things to watch for: I expect the military will soon be storming Guanacevi and someone's started the clock on the archbishop. A week ago, I would have said Chapo won't be in Guanacevi, of course. But a week ago, nobody was saying where he makes his home and Chapo wasn't painting giant neon Xes on himself for Calderón to find.

THE BORDER REPORT

As far as villains go, George Iknadosian seemed the Hollywood archetype for the role. Everything about the merchant fit the bill for a proper switch in title, from gunstore owner to arms dealer.

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THE BORDER REPORT

Among the U.S.'s first foreign policy involvements in Latin America was Mexico during the Revolution. Just about a century ago, Mexico was in turmoil, its military dictator, Porfirio Díaz dead and the country in shambles. Pancho Villa tearing it up in the north, Emiliano Zapata to the south. The machine gun was barely 25 years old.

At the time, Pres. Woodrow Wilson turned to the U.S. military, ordering soldiers to the border with Mexico to keep the war from spilling over. Infantry divisions were ordered to the Rio Grande in Texas and Naco, Ariz., to keep the Revolution in Mexico. It either worked or, more apparent, the Revolution never reached beyond El Paso (and Patrick Murphy's drunken bombing of Naco).

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